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I’m So Grateful

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Ok, so the first part of this post is random.  But I felt like sharing my thoughts with this community because I figured if anyone can relate, it would be all my fellow animal lovers here.  And for some reason I need to find someone who can relate with this.  With one holiday behind us, and another coming up fast, I’m so grateful for my family.  I’m grateful for the love between us and the many blessings God has given us.  My house is not fancy, it’s actually very plain.  But it’s a home, with heat and safety, and filled to the brim with fur babies to warm our hearts as well.  I’m most grateful for that blessing.  Cold weather is settling in, with temps in the 20’s overnight.  We’ve been getting rain and snow flurries.  I used to love winter without hesitation.  But that was when I was a child and I didn’t know the things I know now.  I still prefer the cold of winter to the heat of summer.  But I can’t really enjoy it anymore.  Because everytime I’m sitting on my couch with my son and at least a couple animals, all snuggled up in a blanket, I worry about and feel sorry for those babies and animals that don’t have that shelter/warmth/love.  When the snow is falling, I can’t look at it the way most people do and just see the beauty of the snow.  I worry about that short haired dog that some sad excuse of a human being has left tied up in the back yard with not even so much as a dog house, shivering under that snow.  I hate that I can’t enjoy it.  I try to.  But no matter what I always come back to those poor animals.  I just want to go out and find them all and just hold them until they’re warm, until they aren’t scared anymore.  It hurts my heart to know they’re suffering and I can’t save them.  I recently realized that because of this, I felt guilty for the things I have, that I didn’t show my appreciation enough, if that makes sense.  So now I’m trying to change my view point.  Turning a new leaf.  I don’t really have to feel bad for the blessings in my life, as long as I use those blessings to help other people/animals when I have the opportunity.  Maybe this new view point will help me enjoy the season a little more. 

One thing I don’t have any problem enjoying is the six animals in my home, 3 dogs, 3 cats.  5 of which were once homeless and we brought in.  Not the least of which is our Roxy.  Roxy is a trooper, like all tripawds.  She just happened to wander into our back yard that cold May night in 2009.  I just happened to look out my window just in time to see her trotting along.  How she was going, I’ll never understand.  She was so close to death, so exhausted, she slept for 3 days.  She ate off of a paper plate with her head laying on it because she couldn’t hold her head up.  She came around though.  Her hair was coarse, but her bones slowly faded from sight.  She would hang out on the outskirts of rooms and watch us, and watch the other two dogs play.  Then she started barking at them from the edges of their wrestling matches.  Then she eventually joined them, very cautiously at first. 

Then came the diagnosis in January 2010.  God, it was so unfair.  She just found a good life.  So we decided to give her another chance.  On March 2, 2010, her leg was amputated.  Since then we’ve had our fair share of scares.  She was diagnosed with arthritis, which is an uphill battle all on its own.  She has near constant allergy breakouts (which I’m always swearing is a return of the Mast Cell).  But she is so. incredibly. happy.  And for that, I would do it all again.  And now, almost 2-and-a-half years to the day she showed up, Roxy is a cuddler!!!  She will hop up on the couch, get her neck rubs, and instead of jumping down and laying by herself when the rubs are done, she lays down against your leg.  I don’t know if you guys understand how huge this is, but….THIS IS HUGE!!  I didn’t think she would ever do it.  I didn’t think she would ever have that level of comfort, or need to be close to us, or whatever it is that changed.  But it’s there.  And once again I am in awe of Roxy.  She’s so beautiful.  And I am so grateful. 

As I mentioned, her amputation was done on March 2, 2010.  Which makes tomorrow 21 MONTHS!!  Just one more terrific thing to celebrate this season.  Now, I’m one of those people that is always afraid if I say something out loud I’m going to jinx it.  (I’m really just a kid at heart).  So I’m really hoping things stay good for Roxy.  She deserves every second of happiness she’s gotten in the last couple years, plus so many more.  So tonight, I’m going to sit on the floor with Roxy.  I’m going to give her a good long belly rub, and a little extra behind the ears.  I’m going to tell her that she is so incredibly special, that she has taught me so much, that her resilience is amazing, that the light in her eyes is awe inspiring, that she’s one hell of a fighter, and I’m so grateful.

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  1. etgayle Said:

    on December 1, 2011 at 6:21 pm   

    it’s frustrating when you realize ‘you can’t be all things to all people’. but the fact that your heart feels these things, and you know you want to help says you are a good person, who obviously is doing good things. don’t focus on the mountain, just take it step by step. and…HAPPY AMPUVERSARY ROXY!!! wow, 21 months, that’s excellent!!! you and gayle are really close in dates, and it warms our heart to know you are doing so well!!!

    charon & gayle

  2. AbbysMom Said:

    on December 1, 2011 at 7:38 pm   

    Wow Roxy – 21 months is VERY impressive.

    What a fighter. And she does totally deserve all the good things that you’ve brought to her life. That’s awesome that she has discovered the joy of a good cuddle!

    Give her an extra cuddle from us,
    Jackie, Abby’s mom

  3. chilidawg Said:

    on December 1, 2011 at 8:48 pm   

    Wow, Roxy! Congrats! I hope you get some extra treats 🙂 Finchy sends you a head butt!

    Jenna & Spirit Chili Dawg

  4. jerry Said:

    on December 5, 2011 at 12:17 am   

    Ohhh i can relate to worrying about all the other pups and animals out there who don’t have a warm safe place to be, especially this time of year. But you have to try to remember that one of us can only do so much; collectively though, we can change the world. So keep on making a difference for animals and show others how they can too, and the world can be a better place for everyone.

    As for Roxy…go girl! Wooo hoo!!! Hey you are a real inspawaration to us. My pawrents are worried that their Wyatt Ray Dawg will never be a cuddler either. After all he had a hard life too so he can relate. But now that we know you were able to love humans like that again, I’m pretty sure that Wyatt will too. Thank you! And again, congrats on your ampuversary!

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